Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Deep Snow Hike

We went hiking today in the wildlife refuge. The snow is knee deep! We didn't get too far, it was too exhausting!

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Mall of America



Yesterday my wife and I spent the day at the Mall of America. We went with our friends Mike and Sue.


We toured Underwater Adventures.





Then we ate lunch at the Bubba Gump Shrimp Company.








In case you didn't figure it out, that's me imitating Forest Gump.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Protect Your Nuts

For the band Christmas party tonight, we discovered that Dave and I had picked the same "holiday" shirt...

Merry Christmas Jim!

Merry Christmas to my brother Jim, who spent Christmas (and then some) at the airport keeping it safe for humanity.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas Snow!

It has been snowing for two days and is supposed to continue for another day or two. We're pretty good at dealing with it here in Minnesota, so it hasn't prevented us from going to any Christmas parties!

Merry Christmas!

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Christmas Parkway

This is a peak at Burnsville Parkway. My condo looks out at this view--which is quite nice during the Christmas season. Both sides of the parkway are decorated with lights!

Monday, December 21, 2009

Looking For Christmas

Cutris is looking for the true spirit of Christmas.



As "Christmas" (i.e. the various parties/gatherings) has been changed repeatedly this year, I am beginning to feel somewhat "humbug" about it. Of course, at work, we can only refer to Christmas with the words, "Happy Holidays."

As I hammered through an uncooperative software upgrade today, all I wanted to do was go get "lost" in the woods for awhile.

"'Tis the season..."

Remember in the "Charlie Brown Christmas," when Charlie Brown asks if anyone knows what Christmas is all about? Linus does a pretty good job of answering that question.
I love that scene.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Don't Kill the Cougar!

While there are a lot of great things about Minnesota, there is a history of shameful handling of wildlife that wander into areas populated by humans. One might think we would have more respect for our wild animals, but that is obviously not the case, as large animals (wild or domestic) that enter towns and cities are routinely gunned down with extreme prejudice.

Recently, a cougar spotted in the Twin Cities area (see links below) has been in the news with great frequency. News crews are dispatched and trigger happy, public safety officials seem to be drooling to get a shot at this "interloper." In Minnesota's defense, surrounding states seem to be quite adept at killing any last cougar they can get their sights on as well.

Back in 2005, I met a trio of brothers in Murdo, South Dakota, at the Rusty Spur. One of them was a rancher, and he claimed that cougars were known to attack his horses. This could certainly be a concern if you were a rancher, but I am somewhat shocked that a single cougar in a suburb in a supposedly, "wilderness state" such as Minnesota should cause such a panic, fervor and blood-lust!

As a volunteer park ranger in the Minnesota Valley National Wildlife Refuge, I can tell you that I would consider myself very lucky to see a cougar while hiking in the bottom-land forest. Would I be freaked out or scared? Maybe a little. But isn't the world a little richer when there are magnificent creatures like cougars in it? The likelihood of one attacking me is extremely remote. In fact, the coyotes that roam these areas are more likely to attack, and I have rarely even seen one--though I know they live there.

In 1987, I had the honor of spending a week camped on Admiralty Island, in S.E. Alaska. The large population of coastal brown bears allowed my friend John and I to stay on their island, without harming us. Standing across from an 800 lb. bear, knowing that there was no fence, moat or barrier between us was undoubtedly a highlight of my life!

So I ask, no I plead with everyone, to let the cougar alone! It doesn't want to be around people. It's lost and wandering and free and beautiful! Why should one, single large cat be seen as such a threat to the thousands and thousands of people who have usurped its ancestral land? Jeez people! Wake up and allow room in your hearts and your world for one of God's most spectacular creatures!

KJC

http://www.kare11.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=830084

http://www.twincities.com/ci_14005257

http://www.twincities.com/ci_14011504

http://www.startribune.com/local/east/79340727.html?elr=KArks:DCiU1OiP:DiiUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aUU

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

7 Keys to Happiness

In my life I've learned a few important things.

1. People usually do the exact opposite of what they need to do to get what they want most.
2. True love is hard to find and is worth making sacrifices for.
3. A moment spent trying to understand the viewpoint of someone you disagree with, is almost always time well spent.
4. Forgiveness is the ultimate gift to everyone, including yourself.
5. Don't let your pride ruin your happiness.
6. Don't hurt the people you love.
7. Recognize that "always being right" can "cost" a lot.

KJC

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Snow Day!

The school district I work in called a snow day!
My wife works in a school district further north (away from the storm) and has to go in.

Monday, December 07, 2009

Old Mountain Dew Ad

I remember this from when I was a kid!

I photographed this old sign in an antique gallery in Redwing, Minnesota.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Elevator Restrooms

I'm not sure why you would put restrooms in an elevator, but apparently elevator restrooms do exist.


Unless the elevator ride is exceptionally long, I don't understand why restrooms would be necessary. Likewise, I see no advantage to having restrooms move up and down, unless it is a way so that not as many restrooms need to be built. Maybe that's it! If you need a restroom, push the button and one will come up or down (from another floor) if it isn't in use.

I'm still not clear as to how the water pipes are incorporated into an elevator, unless they are chemical toilets and need to be emptied periodically. This would likely be done on the lower level.

Friday, December 04, 2009

Holiday Gift Idea

I've tried unsuccessfully for years to get my family to stop buying Christmas presents. I like getting together with everybody, but the whole commercialized, gift thing makes it stressful!

In the case of children, that's different. Kids love Christmas presents!

For the rest of us, unless we want to "break the bank" buying nice, expensive gifts, most people don't need that $10 or $20 gift. They can just buy it themselves!

I used to give gift cards for dinner at a nice restaurant. Then, I realized that there were potential problems with this as these cards might have time limits, etc. Even more reason to be careful with gift cards, is the number of establishments that are going out-of-business! Buy a card from one of these places, and your recipient may end up with nothing!

So last year, I decided to give to charities in the names of my family members. In fact, last year money was donated in my name to charity as well! We started a nice trend I think.

So if you want to do some good and make Christmas shopping easier, give to charities in the names of the people you would normally buy presents for. Just tell the charities (very specifically) what you want (i.e. receipt, gift card/acknowledgment).

And for any charities out there, if someone wants to donate instead of buying Christmas presents, make sure to promptly address these requests, or you may not get the donation next year.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

-KJC

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

A Cutris Christmas Story

One day, Cutris received a call from Santa Claus.

Santa asked Cutris to help him find his magic reindeer, Rudolph.



Unfortunately, Cutris went the wrong way, and ended up at the mall.



















Someone called security, and he was given the "big boot."




So, he decided to look for Rudolph out in the woods.
Suddenly, Cutris realized that he was lost and it was getting dark.






So, he used a tree to build himself a shelter.



He spent the night in his simple shelter.



In the morning, Cutris found Rudolph eating some lichens outside the shelter!



Cutris called Santa, and he came and got Rudolph.



Then they all lived happily ever after.

The End

Woods, Nordegren, Grubbs, Uchitel, Moquin

Were you looking for gossip about Tiger Woods?
Sorry! Fooled you! Burn! Ha ha!

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Arrivals & Departures

The hawk is the messenger from heaven and the eagle flies closest to the creator. They often show up when we need them. They come during ceremonies. They also seem to be abundant during births and deaths. My new nephew is a week old. When we went to see him the morning of his birth, My wife and I saw eight or ten hawks on the drive to drop off his siblings with their dad and then to the hospital. I always notice hawks when I drive, but this quantity was unusual.

I sometimes wonder if the renewed interest in spirituality (among some members of society) is due to the increased population of "messenger" birds (since the DDT ban); or are the birds more abundant because of the fact that our higher consciousness sees their value?

Recognizing the "magic" sets you ahead of the crowd. We live in houses, cities, etc. that are man-made. We can only experience reality by accepting the natural world. If we choose to accept these things, the world, life and death, all gain new meaning.

Life and death, after all, are similar events. Picture an airport, and the departures (death) are sad places. On the next level, arrivals (birth) are joyous. Interesting how an airplane is kind of like a big bird isn’t it?

Monday, November 30, 2009

Stay Healthy

During these times when we are trying to avoid H1N1 and other contagious diseases, it is important to follow simple rules to maintain health and avoid transferring illness to our friends and families. We may need to encourage others to use these guidelines, if they are not familiar with them. As we get together over the holidays, etc., please be conscious of this.

We have probably all heard about keeping hands and food preparation clean. There is another very basic way to help prevent spreading germs and viruses. Everyone should use serving utensils when putting food on their plates. The fork or spoon you are eating with should never be used to take food from the communal serving dish.

This is why restaurant buffets and salad bars demand that you use serving spoons and a new plate upon each trip. This may seem to be standard for some of us, but it is not for everyone. Please help to encourage everyone to keep our friends and families healthy.

Thanks, and have a great holiday season!

K.

Saturday at Nine Mile Creek

On Saturday, we hiked along Nine Mile Creek in Bloomington, MN. Here are a few images.




Friday, November 27, 2009

8th Annual Red Wing Holiday Stroll

We went to the 8th Annual Red Wing Holiday Stroll this late afternoon/evening. It was quite festive with free chili, music and barrels stoked with burning logs!



Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Cutris Attacked by Mall Bear

Cutris Attacked by Mall Bear
UnAssociated Press
November 24, 2009

You may have heard of Mall Rats, but what about mall bears?

Cutris was posing for a picture at a local mall recently, when he was apparently attacked and bitten by a statue bear. Cutris said that the whole thing was "quite a surprise," but he was uninjured--because "mall bears aren't all that dangerous."

Saturday, November 21, 2009

November Hike

Today, it was sunny and 50 degrees (Fahrenheit). It was too nice of a day to pass up. My wife and I went hiking on the state trail parallel to the Bluff Trail in the Long Meadow Lake unit of the Minnesota Valley National Wildlife Refuge.

The three Bald Eagles that circled us, didn't wait for pictures. That did not stop me, however, from taking plenty of them. Here are a couple that I'm willing to share.

-KJC




Friday, November 20, 2009

Many People Suck

Many people suck. Some don’t, but many do. Certain groups of people have a higher likelihood of sucking, such as bosses, owners, politicians, lawyers and commission sales people. This is because they tend to have private agendas that often conflict with that of the rest of the population (who may or may not suck too).

It is important to give everyone a chance, even if they come from a group that elevates their personal likelihood of sucking. If you are open-minded when dealing with individuals, you can feel good about yourself—even if later you learn that they do indeed suck.

There are levels of sucking. For example, some bosses are incompetent. That sucks, because it makes it harder for everyone to do a good job. Still, that doesn’t mean that they are trying to suck. They may just suck and not know it.

In other cases, for example, a boss might actually try to make life miserable for employees. This is a malevolent boss, which is far worse than an incompetent boss. However, it is fairly common that an incompetent boss may assert themselves, in an effort to make it appear that the true cause of a problem lies with someone else. These, insecure bosses will try to limit communications and avoid following the recommendations of experts in the vicious cycle to assert their authority to hide their own suckiness. This is known as, someone who doubly-sucks.

The question gets down to, how does one function within the environment of someone who sucks—especially if that person is in a position of control? Obviously one can try to relocate to a new place, where the person who sucks has no authority. This is a good strategy, except that you may run into a new person, who also sucks.

A second choice is to try to work within the existing sucky realm. If you can exist in the realm of suck, without spending all of your time and energy avoiding the person who sucks, you might stick it out and wait to see if they eventually suck so bad that someone notices. This may or may not happen, and the chain-of-command may actually suck all the way to the top.

If you don’t understand this essay, it is quite possible that you suck as well. If you see yourself in the descriptions, I’m afraid I can’t help that. Hopefully, you enjoyed my commentary, and you didn’t think it sucked too much. If not, that probably sucks.

-Cutris

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

This Week's Sponsors

I Am Cutris is made possible in part by,

Rapid Ho, if your ho is too slow, call Rapid Ho!

Hellways Superstore, it's just like what Hell must be like!

Ghetto Foods, "...like you got it from a guy who sold it out the back of a truck."

Friday, November 13, 2009

Cutris had Previous Run-in with Garbage Frog

Cutris had Previous Run-in with Garbage Frog
UnAssociated Press
November 13, 2009

This picture obtained by the UnAssociated Press, clearly shows Cutris running like a girl--from the garbage frog that attacked him earlier this week. This photo was carbon dated, and appears to have been taken in early September of this year. This could explain why the garbage frog was so quick to attack.



This photo clearly shows Cutris running like a girl from the garbage frog.





While unpredictable, garbage frogs often prefer to blend into their surroundings to avoid confrontation. They are, however, predatory, and will try to eat anything they can swallow. "Cutris may have resembled a large cricket," said University of High Tuition, entomologist Bugs Malone. "Or, it may have just been a case of protecting its territory."

When asked to comment, Cutris flashed reporters an obscene gesture and ran away.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Cutris Battles Garbage Frog

Cutris Battles Garbage Frog
UnAssociated Press
November 11, 2009

The UnAssociated Press has obtained photos of Cutris fighting with a giant, garbage frog. The situation apparently got out-of-hand, when Cutris approached the garbage frog, and it suddenly attacked!

A bystander apparently snapped these photos before running to safety. Cutris would not comment on the incident, except to say that garbage frogs are "unpredictable," and that both he and the frog were alright after the altercation.






Cutris is shown pointing at the garbage frog.





Cutris takes on a defensive stance.




Cutris uses his fighting skills to protect himself.







Click on photos to enlarge.

Veteran's Day!

Today we acknowledge the United States of America Veterans.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Ann Taylor: No Men's Couch???

I've previously blogged about my experience at Ann Taylor, waiting for my wife while she looks at clothes. Recently, I found myself being led back into this place that is so strange for any heterosexual man.

Instantly, we were asked by one of the female employees (Note* I have never seen a man working there--which is further proof that this is no place for men), if "we" needed any help finding something. I answered that I wasn't actually looking for anything. When the next employee (Note* There were about two employees for every one customer) asked if "we" had any questions, I said that I did not.

As my wife continued looking, I began to read to her aloud, the "what we believe" sign, that was hanging on the wall. What propaganda/drivel! Then, I went to find the "men's couch," that has been my refuge several times before on these expeditions. It is usually "outfitted" with some kind of magazine (one, maybe two) that would have some appeal for a man. But... alas... there was no couch!!!

Suddenly, I did have a question!!!
"What happened to the men's couch???" I asked the nearest sales woman.
She said that it had been moved into the office in the back of the store.
"I have to go back there???" I asked, (fearing what might be hidden in the depths of the Ann Taylor store--unseen by the general public).

She told me I couldn't go back there. Relieved, I said, "You need to bring the couch back!" She told me that she would let the manager know.

As my petite wife led me back out of this strange and frightening place, I shivered at the thought that the last refuge for men had been removed from Ann Taylor. It was truly, no place for men.

Monday, November 09, 2009

News Headlines You'll Never See

For your enjoyment, Cutris has compiled a brief list of news headlines that you are probably never going to see.

1. Young Urban Males Decide to Wear Pants that Fit

2. Man Admits, That as a Child He Molested Priests

3. Hero Cat Saves the Day!

4. Paris Hilton Graduates

5. Cheney Admits Guilt

6. Government Center Condemned to make Room for New Lake

7. Woman to Lead Taliban

8. Phone Company Pays Customers to End Contract Early

9. Al Sharpton Makes Sense

10. Vikings Win Super Bowl!

Lighting

Saturday we spent some time at the Tamarack Nature Center, in the beautiful, 60 degree Fahrenheit, November weather.

The afternoon Sun made for spectacular lighting for photography. I usually don't put my best pictures on my blog (just in case I ever want to publish a photography book), but here is a sample.

Friday, November 06, 2009

Ten-Year-Old Bus Drivers

Since I first met him, I've been asking my nephew (now age 9) about his car. I'll ask him if I can see his car or his driver's license, and he always reminds me that he is still a kid. I usually seem puzzled by this, and ask how he can drive without a license? Then he tells me he doesn't drive, and then I ask him how he gets to school??? Recently we went through this, and he told me that he rides the bus to school. I exclaimed, "You drive a bus???" He said, "No! I take the bus!" Then I said, "Oh… you shouldn't take the bus if it doesn’t belong to you…"

Soon his four-year-old sister got into the conversation. She is a pretty opinionated four-year-old, so she put her hands on her hips and told me, "He doesn't drive the bus, he isn't old enough!" So, I asked her how old a person has to be before they can drive a bus. She thought for a minute, and replied, "You have to be at least ten!"

KJC

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

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Available at fine drug stores everywhere.


Monday, November 02, 2009

Migizi Flies Closest to the Creator

An eagle flew over me as I left work Tuesday (just before my wife and I endured something very difficult). I took it as a sign that God had not abandoned us. My Ojibwe brother Joe says that Migizi flies closest to the Creator.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Tears

The rain reflects my feelings,
Subtle tears falling for a child whose steps will not be heard.
I know it is for the best,
But I cannot help but to feel sad on this rainy day.

I turn toward the future,
But my wife and I will never forget the past few days.
I love her more than ever.
Our lives are changed forever by the child who never was.

-Kevin J. Curtis

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

The many uses of Tape

Here are just a few of my favorite kinds of tape.


Invisible Tape, for taping invisible things.


Masking Tape, to make masks out of.


"Duck" Tape, in case your duck breaks.

Mounting Tape, To keep the dog from falling off.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Cutris Becomes Extremely Animated

Cutris Becomes Extremely Animated
UnAssociated Press
October 26, 2009

Cutris became extremely animated today, when he was asked to give a brief history of mounting tape. His talk went on for about five minutes, and was very entertaining.

Mounting Tape



















Cutris becomes animated.

Be Cool Stay in School!

My brother-in-law Kou, graduated with his BS in Digital Arts on Friday.
I made this PSA for staying in school that evening.

"Be Kou, Stay in Schoo'"

Friday, October 23, 2009

Email Scammer: Dumber than a Sack of Hammers

Here is the latest correspondence between me (top in blue), and "Mr. Lawson Jean," Internet scammer "extraordinaire" (below).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Dumb Ass,

I can hardly believe how dumb you are. Your dumbness transcends normal dumbness, and transforms it into an innate, ridiculously dumb realm that is usually reserved for cartoon characters. Despite that, I'm going to type some bogus numbers that could resemble a bank account in some really dumb place, such as where you must be from.

First Bank of my Butt: 123-UR-S0-Dum-456

I look forward to to this transaction that "is very proctecd with you." Yada yada, buttface, indigo.

Insincerely yours,

Superman's Grandma

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Fri, 23 Oct 2009 03:32:24 -0700
From: lawsonjean2@yahoo.com
Subject: REPLY.
To: my email

Dear Superman ,

im very happy to read from you to today to know whom you are i must let you know that it realy give me the full mind and trust to work with you in this transaction as one brother hence as matter of fact this transaction is very proctecd with you.

However i want you to confirm to me about the bank account so that i will send you the application letter to enable you be incontact with the bank here for claimof the funds to your country.

Thanks and waiting your urgent reply.
Yours partner
MR LAWSON JEAN.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-

Thursday, October 22, 2009

"Lawless Genes," expurrt email scammer

This reply from the email scammer came today. My new reply is above it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear brother, Mr. Lawless Genes,

Thank you for not reading my email and for supplying me with this bunch of crap about the 100% risky transaction. Rest assured, that I have not told anyone except the FBI and Interpol. I look forward to meeting you face to face, so I can kick you in the gnads, if you have any.

Here is the information that you have requested,

NAME: SUPERMAN - You must have missed this when you didn't read the previous email.
AGE:116 - But I workout
ADDRESS: 1122 Boogey-Boogey Avenue
COUNTRY: Krypton - I guess you missed this part too...
PROFESSION: Special Agent, in charge of Internet Scams
TEL: 555-555-1234
FAX: 555-555-5678

I look forward to closing this deal, blazay, factoid, Nebuchadrezzar.

Your friend and partner,

Cutris... I mean "Superman"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Thu, 22 Oct 2009 02:14:07 -0700
From: lawsonjean2@yahoo.com
Subject: Thanks for mail.
To: my email

Dear Partner,

Thank you very much for your response. First I want to let you know that Togo is in West Africa country and Lome is the capital city and that I am a chistian. I want to let you know that I have carefully reseach and plan for the execution of this transaction. All the necessary arrangement to make it a legal and successful transaction have been meant and I need you to just put a finishing touches on this for the consummation.

and i want you to know that this transaction is %100 free riske and for that you have noting to worry about hence i am with you here on any area you may not understand by the bank. i will suplly you evry inforamtions to make suer the fund transfer to your account in your country savetly. and i must let you know that this transaction need both of us to work together as one family hence we are going to meet our selfe face to face when we progress with it in your country. So please my good partner fee free for there is noting to worry about this transaction is going to be of benefit to both of us at the end we will see goodness of it when it is done. and i want you to know that i contcated you for this transaction to be my partner and brother .

I will direct you on what to do and you have to follow the instruction carefully to apply to the Bank where they we approved and transfer the fund to your designated account. You may need to open a new account without any fund on for the transfer of this fund. if You don't have to mixed your private fund with this money to avoid confusion at the end of the transfer and also for security reasons..

I will like to have the following information from you to anable me prepared
other important documents in your name to prepared you to submit application of claim to the Bank for the approval and transfer of the fund to your account and as soon as you do that the Bank will not delay to transafer the funds into tour account over ther in your country and when you infom me of that i will be coming to your country for my onw shere and you will have your own 40% of the total fundsfor your kind assist. and also we can do some investmen in your country together in any area that you know it will be good for a business investment overe there .. so plesae my Dear partner i realy want you to take me as your realy blood brother hence i beleive as soon as we progress with this transaction we shall meet our selfe face to face as one family.

Things needed from you now are bellow so that we can move foarward with this transaction.
YOUR NAME:
AGE:
ADDRESS:
COUNTRY:
PROFESSION:
TEL:
FAX ANY:

I will need to talk with you to let you know more of what you have to do to
get this transaction successfully completed. You can let me have you private phone number and the best time to call you to discuss this very sensitive transaction..
Finally I will want you to assure me that you will keep this transaction strictly know to yourself alown. It is very important to keep this transaction confidential to avoid it been jeopardise.

I will wait for you to get back to me with the information.
Thanks once again and God bless.
Mr LAWSON JEAN.
You can call me
on my private number
+228-989-75-88


-

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

"Urgent Please" email scams

Here's my reply to the latest email scam I got. My answer is above the original.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Friend (who I've never met),

I'm "Superman!" I come from a planet called Krypton! I can help you!

I was intrigued by your email (that was sent to someone else). I understand that many people in Africa have millions of dollars that they want to share with poor Americans.

You probably want my bank information, but I have a better idea. I am in need of a goat. My lawn is covered by leaves from the trees as fall sets in. A goat could eat these leaves and then I wouldn't have to rake!

Please send all of your goats to Minnesota, "Attention, Superman."

Thanks Mr. Lawson Jean!

Cutris

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Wed, 21 Oct 2009 05:23:47 -0700
From: ecobank_ltogo@yahoo.com
Subject: URGENT PLEASE
To: dotbum@hotmail.com

URGENT PLEASE

Dear Friend,

I m Mr LAWSON JEAN.. From lome Togo West Africa Country..Please i need your urgent assistance to transfer the sum of $11.3million immediately to your country. i will await your urgent responds so that i will give you evry details about this transaction for you to
follow it up immediately.

Thanks and your urgent responds is needed if you are intrested please.

Mr LAWSON JEAN .
Phone Contact +228-989-75-88

-

Friday, October 16, 2009

Road Trip

We took a short road trip today through Prescott, Wisconsin, Redwing, Minnesota and then stopped by the Watt Munisotaram, Buddhist Temple between Farmington and Hampton, Minnesota.


The Wisconsin side of the Mississippi River.


Watt Munisotaram Buddhist Temple

Tuesday, October 13, 2009