I am CuTRis

Flying Saucer Lands on CuTRis ; Again! Unassociated Press July 25, 2017 For the 15th time in the last 43 minutes, CuTRis has had a flying saucer land on him. So far, he has not yet been abducted by aliens. Witnesses say that CuTRis has shooed the aliens away with a stick.

I love the original Star Trek , but due to the age of the shows, the " special effects " are not always realistic—by today's standards. That makes it OK for watching with my preschool age son, because the "scary" things are usually just funny. Our favorite "funny" episode might be, Annihilate! Me and my son laugh about it because Spock was attacked by a pancake ! You can watch it HERE ; but there may be a "warning" that it might not be suitable for younger viewers (who may have fears of being attacked by flying breakfast food)! "I'm a doctor not a short order cook! Nurse! I need a spatula!"

By the time Bastardly realized that all his money was used up, he was out of booze and didn't have enough to buy a pizza! His wife, Jena Sequa, was normally ill tempered and now with no money, and no drugs, she was downright impossible! Bastardly had by this time, reached the only logical decision to reclaim his wealth and lifestyle. He would rob a bank! Bastardly knew little about bank robbery. In fact, he knew little about anything at all. He decided to go out for a walk to think. Thinking was not something that Bastardly was very good at. One thing that Bastardly did have going for him, was that he was lucky. For some reason, in spite of his low intelligence and desire to spend his life in a drunken stupor, Bastardly somehow always had enough money—until now. As he tried to think, he was suddenly amused by one of his own fart s. As he laughed out loud, he noticed a strange looking dude nearby. The dude waved a stringy arm at him. Bastardly thought the guy must be an alien—...

Cycle 4, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting Well, it has been 117 zenagrenbills since I last explored the Blue Planet. I left the Bindir section of the home world after receiving my orders. Patussi only knows why I was so unlucky as to have to return here. I would much rather visit the Pilmorai on Vindis 8. But, here I am, ready to once again, observe the bipedal creatures of the Blue Planet. Perhaps the bipedal creatures will finally show a few remoflacions of intelligence; but I did not hold out much hope of that happening. When I materialized on the planet's surface, the temperature was above 22 helo-hectars. The bipedals were still using quad-rolling transports and were still burning prehistoric biotoxins to power almost everything. I saw a particular bipedal creature who while stumbling and emitting a foul odor, seemed quite pleased with things and appeared in a pleasant state. I attempted to make contact and the creature seemed eager to communicate. I ...

Cycle 2, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting It has been 29 zenagrenbills since I last explored the Blue Planet. I have been spending some time in the studio on Tolopious, in the Bindir section of the home world. I have been composing mathematical auditory vibrations for my new “Remoflactions” album. I actually got the idea while studying the Blue Planet. I have yet to find any remoflactions of intelligent life. Patussi only knows why I am drawn back to this lowly planet. While I see some similarities between the bipedal creatures that live here, and the Pilmorai of Vindis 8, the Pilmorai are in reality, far more sophisticated and interesting study subjects. Still, I have an idea that more exploration of the Blue Planet might reveal something important. As fate would have it, I materialized in the midst of a group of primitive, young bipedals, who expressed what could only be referred to as “threatening” behavior. They wore ill-fitting outer coverings. The lower half ha...

April 20, 2007 Cycle 1, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting This is my fourth visit to the Blue Planet. I have not, in my three previous visits seen any remoflactions of intelligent life. It has been an entire solar cycle since I have been here. My initial reaction was one of disbelief. The bipedal beings are still using bio-toxins to power everything from their quad-rolling transports, to the increasing or decreasing of the temperature in their dwellings. They also continue to be preoccupied with holding radio transmitters to their auditory canals and communicating endlessly about Patussi-knows-what, in a loud manner. I have chosen to explore the warmer half of the planet. There were plenty of brain cell damaging beverages when I arrived at an outdoor gathering. The event I materialized into, featured several beings using amplified noise making devices and screaming into vocal amplifiers. They did this in a rhythmical pattern and it seemed to be appreciated by those wh...

Below is the first "Unglip" story, which predates this blog. ---------------------------------------------------------- August 26, 2004 Cycle 3, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting. I have been trying to blend in since arriving here. I do not have a rolling, transportation device or a portable, electronic unit to vocalize into while I walk or drive. I'm afraid it has caused me to stand out. During the previous cycle of the sun, I attempted to ride the long transport that picks these beings up on the corners of the rolling-surface. I got onboard, and I was looked at harshly and the operator vocalized and motioned toward a machine. I had seen someone put small metal disks into it, and I attempted to insert three domblecks into the slot. The machine would not accept them and I was (I'm assuming) told to leave the transport. I did not understand the vocalizations, but it sounded like, "dam-for-ener!" I proceeded to a sustenance depot, where I beg...

April 11, 2006 Cycle 1, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting Once again, I have returned to the Blue Planet in search of any remoflactions of Intelligent Life. My last two visits were inconclusive, though most of my observations lead me to believe that there are no higher forms of intelligence here. I disguised myself in the synthetic/plant material coverings that the dominant species use to cover themselves with. My plan was to once again, move about the communal living spaces where the bipedal beings tend to congregate. They were, of course, still utilizing the two-way radio devices that are frequently seen being held close to their auditory canals. They were also still traveling in quad-rolling transports. I’ve noticed that procreation seems to be handled by two very different members of the same species –much like the Pilmorai of Vindis 8. Unlike the Pilmorai though, the close connection between the sexes is not always harmonious. The two divisions seem bent on disag...

August 17, 2005 Cycle 3, Blue Planet Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting. I have returned to the Blue Planet in search of intelligent life. Last time, my findings were inconclusive. The temperature was lower today, below 17 helo-hectars. The bipedal beings have not changed much in the past rotation around the star. They still drive quad-rolling transport devices, and most of them are still vocalizing into small radio devices that they hold against their auditory canals. It seems that none of them are very good at both driving a quad-rolling transport and using a radio vocalizer at the same time. I would have thought that during the past solar orbit they would have improved their skills. It seems that their lack of intelligence is more so than I had first anticipated. They are still using prehistoric biotoxins to power almost everything. The residue has caused significant damage to the environmental well-being of this planet. Again, the bipedal beings seem to be too ignorant to fig...