I am CuTRis

“Almost you had it that time! Again try it..." "Nothing bad can happen, it can only good happen."

Russia (now) Blames USA for Drone Attack on Kremlin UnAssociated Press May 4, 2023 May 3, 2023 there was allegedly a drone attack on the Kremlin. After first blaming Ukraine, Russia now is blaming the US. Ukraine says the attack was staged by Russia. This just in! Russia is (now) blaming Biden, Biden is blaming Putin, Putin is blaming Zelenskyy, and more recently, Baby Yoda has been implicated, but he said, "Ask Big Bird you should!"

Alas poor R2D2 . I knew him...

My wife and I went to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens at the cheap theater and we both thought it was great! The writers were smart enough to build it so it resembled the original movie—complete with a bar scene and Han Solo shooting a guy without looking at him and much battling. The movie sets you up for another when Luke Skywalker appears in the last scene. I recommend it for anyone—but especially those of us old enough to remember the original!

  The most recent story from Ben Carson , is that he has fought bad guys in Outer space . In fact, the GOP presidential candidate claims that the Star Wars character, Lando Calrissian is based on him.

Dear Yoda, The R2 unit was very slow again this morning. My wife (Leia) let him take a book while he did potty and no potty happened—only book reading. After much screaming I removed the book and eventually took over control of the download. Download was completed and then I uninstalled the R2 unit from the potty. By now we were running late once again. I am now attempting to reprogram the wife to understand that the R2 unit cannot multi-task at this stage. My plan is to have potty be for potty and not for books and toys. Books are fine when R2 is not actively in the potty for downloading. Though there may be a struggle removing the book, this struggle should take place before entering the potty area. Wish me luck! This type of reprogramming is risky business! Sincerely, Han (from a galaxy far, far away....)

Roman Yogurt Defeats Greek Yogurt UnAssociated Press November 14, 2013 In a violent taste test today, Roman Yogurt has defeated Greek Yogurt in an all-out battle of the taste bud s. Just how this will affect yogurt snobs around the globe is yet unknown. The UnAssociated Press asked Yogurt from Star Wars for a comment on the battle and he said, "Dumb you are for thinking my name is Yogurt!"

DNA Evidence Says CuTRis Not a Skywalker UnAssociated Press July 25, 2013 DNA evidence submitted today proves that CuTRis is not a Skywalker . He is in fact related to the Skyrunner family; but only distantly.

Computer Image of CuTRis as a Child  CuTRis May Be Related to Darth Vader UnAssociated Press July 25, 2013 The rumor circulating today, is that CuTRis is somehow related to Darth Vader --perhaps Vader being his god father . Apparently someone heard the dark lord say (to CuTRis ), "Looook, I am your godfather!" CuTRis has denied the allegations--but the UAP has created a computer generated picture of how CuTRis may have looked as a child. Darth Vader

CuTRis Defeats Storm Troopers UnAssociated Press July 24, 2013  Click on picture to enlarge: click "back" to go back It was reported that Jedi Knight CuTRis was attacked by Imperial Stormtroopers late last evening. He apparently was without his lightsaber at the time--having just come out of the bathroom. Three stormtroopers jumped him and began shooting! CuTRis lucked out when he found a rubber chicken and using it, soundly defeated the three stormtroopers.

CuTRis Seen with Jedi Master UnAssociated Press July 17, 2013  CuTRis and Yoda CuTRis appeared in this photo today with Jedi Master and mentor, Yoda . When asked about the sighting, CuTRis said, "Friends we are from long before."

CuTRis is Probably a Jedi Knight UnAssociated Press July 16, 2013  CuTRis Jedi Knight This photo of CuTRis shows that he is probably a Jedi Knight . This would explain the light saber as well as his tendency to use the Force .