I am CuTRis

Vote for CuTRis ! He can turn into a Rhino UnAssociated Press January 23, 2024 The UnAssociated Press has just learned that CuTRis is considering another run for President . Only this time, he claims that he can turn himself into a rhinoceros ! When asked about this outrageous claim, CuTRis spontaneously morphed into a rhino, and galloped away. He was then, subsequently, unavailable for further comment.

George Santos! You just won Super Bowl 57! What are you going to do next?

George Santos Shoots Down Chinese Spy Balloon UnAssociated Press February 4, 2023 Earlier today, it was reported that George Santos shot down the Chinese spy balloon , using a missile he keeps in his pants for use on these occasions.

"The Santos Position" UnAssociated Press January 30, 2023 The UnAssociated Press just learned that George Santos invented the Missionary Position . Prior to the 1960's it was originally called, the Santos Position.