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Cutris Says No Obstacle Too Big

Cutris Says No Obstacle Too Big
UnAssociated Press
April 1, 2009

Former Presidential candidate Cutris, called a press conference yesterday in the Minnesota Valley National Wildlife Refuge. After the two-hour hike to the site of the press conference, only eight of the original 247 reporters successfully made it to the site. Cutris addressed the "super eight," as he called them, and said he had brought them there to demonstrate a point.

"People in the United States and around the world, need to start working for the common good," Cutris began. "It is no longer good enough that the rich are doing well and the wealth "trickles" down to the masses. This thinking from the Reagan era, has proven false. When people get too greedy, things start to fall apart."

Cutris continued. "Even though common sense might dictate that such things as pollution, bad loans, sending jobs overseas and global warming are bad for everyone, certain business and political leaders were more interested in their own short-term profits, than they were in a strong economy and a better world for the future. The result has left us with with what some have called, The Economic Butt. The time is now, to take back our country and our core values. If we put the country first--before political party infighting, and if we share the responsibilities and the profits, there is no obstacle too big for us to get past!"

To prove his point, Cutris walked over to a huge, dead tree and pulled it loose from the ground and pushed it out of his way--before he exited the conference into the thick brush along the nearby marsh. Awestruck, the eight reporters soon wondered how they would find their way out of the bottom-land forest. Before they became too agitated by their predicament, Cutris reappeared to lead them out.


Cutris moves a tree to illustrate his point.

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