Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Return of Unglip!

Cycle 2, Blue Planet
Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting

It has been 29 zenagrenbills since I last explored the Blue Planet. I have been spending some time in the studio on Tolopious, in the Bindir section of the home world. I have been composing mathematical auditory vibrations for my new “Remoflactions” album. I actually got the idea while studying the Blue Planet. I have yet to find any remoflactions of intelligent life. Patussi only knows why I am drawn back to this lowly planet. While I see some similarities between the bipedal creatures that live here, and the Pilmorai of Vindis 8, the Pilmorai are in reality, far more sophisticated and interesting study subjects. Still, I have an idea that more exploration of the Blue Planet might reveal something important.

As fate would have it, I materialized in the midst of a group of primitive, young bipedals, who expressed what could only be referred to as “threatening” behavior. They wore ill-fitting outer coverings. The lower half had to be continuously held up by one of the two upper appendages. This made it difficult for them to both fight or to retreat—since one appendage was mostly dedicated keeping the cloth coverings from reacting to gravity. For a moment I considered secreting fomboorg on them, but the thought of being written up by Sergeant Splatcher of the Logoseck Division was rather unappealing after the last incident. I remembered how I had barely escaped the inquisition with both my rank and my sanity. It is difficult, however, to observe such low forms of life without sometimes needing to defend oneself.

My best defense seems to be my trusty Sanclop-Ray. More than once I have used it to send threatening beings backward in time by several limosplotches. It allows for me to escape without using the type of force that would get me in trouble with my boss; Sergeant Splatcher. So, I utilized the Sanclop-Ray, and sent the juvenile bipedals backward by 12 limosplotches. I removed myself from their proximity and maneuvered toward the nearest open containment of the molecular compound, made of one part hydrogen and two parts oxygen atoms.

I immediately noticed several things going on around, above and within the large liquid mass. Bipedals were congregated around the outer edge. They were also paddling through it and driving machines that skimmed along the surface. Some of them were attempting to hook the finned creatures that lived inside of the mass and pull them out of the liquid material by using a thin string. Since the temperature of the surrounding atmosphere was warm (above 69 Centoflavers), the creatures seemed to be using the liquid mass to reduce their core temperatures! Could this be the first sign of intelligence on this planet??? Incredible!

I suddenly noticed that there was a primitive looking bipedal creature on a bi-rolling transport device. The device was powered by the bipedal’s lower appendages pushing some sort of gear mechanism. The being rode along, making sound vibrations into a radio vocalizer that was affixed to one of its auditory canals. Suddenly, I decided that I had to try that! So, I reached for the nearest bi-rolling transport—which appeared to be tethered to an immobile object. I secreted a small amount of fomboorg, which melted the restraint. I climbed aboard the transport and balanced my equilibrium in the middle as I pushed the gear device as I had seen the bipedal being do. Who knew that such a primitive contraption as this could be so exhilarating to drive! I increased speed, but not before a different bipedal creature wailed and pointed its extremity in my direction! It seemed to want to do harm to me for using the bi-rolling transport! Perhaps this being wanted this particular transport for itself! I could only surmise that I must flee this danger immediately!

Soon, two of those infuriating aliens wearing blue clothing, with a variety of strange paraphernalia attached, were in pursuit of me on their own bi-rolling transports! I pushed hard into the gears of my transport, but the aliens were gaining on me! I was determined not to be captured by them again, so I pulled my Sanclop-Ray, and shot them backward at least 20 limosplotches! I couldn’t see what setting I had it on at the time, since I was moving so rapidly. Eventually, I stopped the transport and rematerialized onboard my interstellar vehicle. I wasted no time leaving the Blue Planet let-me-tell-you! I’m afraid I may have rushed too quickly into believing that there could be a few remoflactions of intelligence here! These beings are barbaric and slow witted! I thanked Patussi that I was leaving again! I don’t know why I keep coming back to this ridiculous planet…


Past Unglip links,

http://cutris.blogspot.com/2007/04/origins-of-unglip.html

http://cutris.blogspot.com/2005/08/interstellar-traveler-unglip-reporting.html

http://cutris.blogspot.com/2006/04/interstellar-traveler-unglip-reports.html

http://cutris.blogspot.com/2007/04/unglip-rides-again.html

No comments: