The thoughts of a writer.

Friday, April 20, 2007


My school (where I work) just went into lockdown.
We're safe, but things are really wild...

This was put out...

Public Info

On 4-20-07 a staff member from XXXXXX Junior High School found an unspent cartridge in a hallway within the school.

We immediately “locked-down” the school and notified the XXXXX Police Department. Police officials are assisting staff members with a search of the premises.

At this time, no one is allowed to come or leave the school to ensure the safety of students and staff members.

Please leave your phone # and we can update you when more information is available..

Thanks for your call

Unglip Rides Again

April 20, 2007
Cycle 1, Blue Planet
Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting

This is my fourth visit to the Blue Planet. I have not, in my three previous visits seen any remoflactions of intelligent life. It has been an entire solar cycle since I have been here. My initial reaction was one of disbelief. The bipedal beings are still using bio-toxins to power everything from their quad-rolling transports, to the increasing or decreasing of the temperature in their dwellings. They also continue to be preoccupied with holding radio transmitters to their auditory canals and communicating endlessly about Patussi-knows-what, in a loud manner.

I have chosen to explore the warmer half of the planet. There were plenty of brain cell damaging beverages when I arrived at an outdoor gathering. The event I materialized into, featured several beings using amplified noise making devices and screaming into vocal amplifiers. They did this in a rhythmical pattern and it seemed to be appreciated by those who were present.

I was already disguised in baggy, ill-fitting, torn cloth, and I fit in pretty well. The beings were largely incapacitated by the brain cell damaging beverages, as well as other brain function altering chemicals. In order to further fit into the group, I breathed in a toxic cloud of plant fibers that was handed to me. It was rolled into a parchment of some kind. The material, while ghastly primitive, gave off an effect similar to the BonJuvvi that is ingested on Tolopious in the Bindir sector of our home world. It made me want to hear more of the mathematical sounds and I also felt like ingesting the crispy fried, tuber snacks that were at a stand near the back of the gathering.

I ordered a parchment boat full of the tuber snacks, and the being serving them got angry when I tried to leave with the snacks. It soon occurred to me that I must need to compensate these insane creatures with some kind of metallic token, like I’ve seen them do in the past. I didn’t have any metal tokens, but I handed the attendant the bag of dried flowers that I found near the beings that were breathing the smoke from the plant fibers that were rolled in parchment. This seemed to satisfy payment for the fried tuber snacks.

After finishing the snacks, I required hydration. There was a large metallic receptacle with a pump on it that had a brown, brain cell damaging liquid in it. My analyzer indicated that it was made from water, roasted grass seed and flowers. I was able to get a portion of it from the pump; since the attendant was busy looking at an opposite sex being, that had removed the top half of its cloths.

That was when I noticed that the being who gave me the fried tuber snacks was being led away by some of those infuriating beings in the blue cloth with all of the paraphernalia attached to it. Why were they always so confrontational? To my dismay, the fried tuber snack attendant started pointing at me and shouting, “He gave me the stuff officer!”
I still do not know what this meant, but it caused the beings to pursue me and attach a metallic torture device to my appendages.

I about had enough by then, so I secreted fomboorg which immediately melted my constraints. This momentarily dumfounded my would-be-captors and I began to run in a bipedal fashion. The blue clothed beings began to fire primitive metal projectiles at me, so I was forced to pull my Sanclop-Ray, which caused them to move backward for the next several limosplotches. By then, I was back onboard my interstellar vehicle and had already launched.

I was intercepted by six, armed flying machines that tried communicating by primitive radio frequencies. They fired their weapons, but I went into rectoroops drive, and easily outpaced them.

Thus, I still have found little indication of intelligent life on the Blue Planet. Perhaps I will have to explore beneath the great waters to find it. That will have to wait though. I am due on Litmus Prime in five grenbills.


Origins of Unglip

Below is the first "Unglip" story, which predates this blog.
August 26, 2004
Cycle 3, Blue Planet
Interstellar Traveler, Unglip Reporting.

I have been trying to blend in since arriving here. I do not have a rolling, transportation device or a portable, electronic unit to vocalize into while I walk or drive. I'm afraid it has caused me to stand out.

During the previous cycle of the sun, I attempted to ride the long transport that picks these beings up on the corners of the rolling-surface. I got onboard, and I was looked at harshly and the operator vocalized and motioned toward a machine. I had seen someone put small metal disks into it, and I attempted to insert three domblecks into the slot. The machine would not accept them and I was (I'm assuming) told to leave the transport. I did not understand the vocalizations, but it sounded like, "dam-for-ener!"

I proceeded to a sustenance depot, where I began to try the local protein and carbohydrates. I was again, escorted from the depot by two aliens wearing blue clothing, with a variety of strange paraphernalia attached. They searched my belongings, and had obviously never seen a Sanclop-Ray before. They became hostile and restrained my extremities with a metal contraption, and put me in a cage in the back of their transport.

Well, I had about enough of this, so I secreted fomboorg, and the transport and the metal restraints melted. I left my would-be captors, and continued on to a refuse depot. There were other aliens nearby, and one offered me some flowers to incinerate and inhale. I soon felt at peace, and there were plenty of small, long-tailed animals to digest. Perhaps this place isn't so bad!


Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Virginia Tech Massacre

What does a coward look like?

Just like what you see in the picture. Shooting unarmed people is not heroic by any stretch of the imagination. It takes an extreme coward.

How sad that anyone could be so screwed-up.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Imus & the "nappy-headed ho's..."

I never cared much for Imus.
Ironically, one of the biggest, self-proclaimed, political correctness gurus that I’ve ever known loves Imus, but that’s another story...
I always saw Imus as a mumbling, grouchy old man.
Still, even here in the “land of the easily offended,” I thought there was supposed to be “freedom of speech.”
If Don Imus offends you, don’t watch or listen to him. This is your right, and it will soon affect his ratings when others join you. Once his ratings go low enough, his sponsors will pull his funding and he will go off the air.
That said, he does have the right to say what he wants to, even if it is completely stupid, as were his comments about the Rutgers University, women’s basketball team, when he referred to them as “nappy-headed ho’s.”
The TV news is filled with this moronic story today.
Al Sharpton, get a life.
Please everybody... just put this into perspective. No one died.
It was completely stupid, what he said and also undeserving of anymore of our time.
Simply turn Imus off if you don’t like him.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Spring Break

Spring Break is nearly over!
Where did the time go?
I got a cold and so, had to cancel some visits.
The weather was rainy, snowy at times, and windy. That made hiking difficult considering my usual places are flooding.
A phone call yesterday informed me that a coworker died in a car accident out of state.
Perhaps I need to put on my tall boots and go hiking anyway...