Wednesday, July 30, 2014

CuTRis Claims to have Punched Ventura

CuTRis Claims to have Punched Ventura
UnAssociated Press
July 30, 2014


In his new book entitled, How I Punched Jesse Ventura & Stuff, local author and former Presidential candidate, CuTRis, states that he,

"...punched Ventura in the knee, and then I fell down and he stepped on me and I had to go to the doctor! When I got to the clinic they asked, 'what happened to you?' So I told them that I fell down after punching a former Navy SEAL who was (formerly) in politics and who now just says a lot of dumb things that make people think he's a dumbass! So then the nurse says, 'Oh, you mean Jesse Ventura?' And I said, 'yeah, how did you know it was him?' Then they patched up my stomach where the giant shoe print was still visible. Then the doctor said to me, 'all right CuTRis, go home and take two aspirin and don't let any former pro wrestlers step on you for at least two weeks.' So I went home and wrote my new book, How I Punched Jesse Ventura & Stuff.

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