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Cutris Solves (all but seven of) the Entire List of Problems Dealing with the Mysteries of Life

Cutris Solves (all but seven of) the Entire List of Problems Dealing with the Mysteries of Life
May 3, 2007
UnAssociated Press

Inside sources have reported that Cutris took time out from his busy schedule, to work on the entire list of problems dealing with the mysteries of life. He allegedly found the list on the Internet and printed it out before beginning the project. After working on it for several hours, Cutris was able to make sense of the entire list, except for seven items.

“Those last seven are pretty hard,” Cutris was quoted as saying. “I can try again in a few weeks. Maybe some of those ‘brainy’ types should have a go at it. Right now, they just don’t seem to make a lot of sense.” Scientists are now trying to verify Cutris’ findings, and they say that he has contributed greatly to the overall database of scientific knowledge by figuring out all but those odd seven mysteries on the list.

Whether or not Cutris will be able to solve the last seven mysteries is, in itself, a mystery. That very fact, has thus created an eighth mystery of life, which has as of yet, been unsolved.

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