I am CuTRis

A small balm, possibly a Chapstick, was found on a local street today. Police were called to investigate the balm, and citizens in the area were evacuated for their own protection in case the balm might explode. The bomb squad was dispatched, but upon arrival refused to defuse the balm, because it wasn’t a bomb. Several seconds passed, before local citizen, Cutris arrived on the scene. After pulling a tissue from his pocket, he picked up the balm and deposited it into a nearby trash receptacle, thus saving the day. Cutris was unavailable for comment, as he was heading home to do some baking.

January 24, 2007 President George W. Bush, I listened to your State of the Union Speech last evening. Some of it was what we were waiting for, like alternative energy. Some of it was misinformation, like Iraq. In the end, I regret to tell you that I don’t believe you. Sincerely, Kevin J. Curtis

Today the CEO’s of several major U.S. corporations asked President Bush to implement tougher standards to limit the production of greenhouse gases that may be causing global warming. The President has refused saying voluntary limits are the way to go. What is wrong when the president refuses to help when corporations want to stop pollution???

Presidential Exploratory Committee January 19, 2007 UnAssociated Press Cutris announced today, that he is forming a presidential campaign exploratory committee. It will be called the, Cutris should be President because regular politicians are making stupid decisions that really suck and are making it hard for the average person to get by in our society and it’s time for a major change like putting Cutris in the White House, committee.

Last evening, as did a huge number of other people, I watched as George W. Bush made the case to add approximately 22,000 more American soldiers in Iraq. The speech came sometime after the evening news, where the top story (in the Twin Cities) had been about yet another Minnesota soldier who had just died in Iraq. When the President came on and laid out “his plan,” I began to wonder why he thought he could go against what seems to be a huge majority of U.S. citizens, who want to bring American troops home and get our military out of Iraq? In a “democratic” country, shouldn’t the people have the last word? Does this make our President a president, or a dictator? Does this mean that our leader is no better than the one who was overthrown in Iraq? These are all questions that flew through my mind, as I also wondered if the President had heard of another military conflict called, The Vietnam War. Have you ever known someone who tried to fix something, and the more they tried, the more it ...

I have put a link to Will Steger’s Global Warming 101 on my links list to the right. http://www.globalwarming101.com/ Global Warming is some pretty scary stuff. Personally, I like to think of environmental issues, such as recycling and conservation, as self-serving things. Perhaps we should all think of it that way. It is, after all, the only planet that I am aware of, that we can live on. We ought to take care of it.

For my friend who I tease about this... White Guy Brand White Rice (commercial) Camera follows Cutris walking and talking… “When I was a kid, my mom made rice every day for breakfast. There’s nothing more satisfying than a ball of sticky-rice in the morning.” Cutris stops, camera zooms slowly in, to medium close-up… “When I went to school, the other kids would be eating their peanut butter & jelly sandwiches at lunchtime, but I would have my white rice, that I carried in a bamboo tube around my neck.” Graphic of logo comes into view as Cutris continues… “I learned to make good rice over all those years, and now I want you to be able to enjoy it as much as I do. That’s why you should look for White Guy Brand White Rice at your grocery store.” Camera widens slowly… “Because nobody knows rice like a white guy.” Commercial fades out…

I saw a Gummie Bear™ on the floor at the school today. It was filthy. It lay there, full of dust and dirt and looking like it had been in a fight. Maybe it had! Gummie Bears have sometimes been known to attack! Sure they look innocent… but if you saw the one that I saw today, it would send a chill down your spine. I left it alone, and hurried down the hall away from it… to safety. I wasn’t going to take any chances.

Saddam Hussein died at the end of a rope. He was once proud and cared little for the common people. This may be true of some of our leaders as well. Of course Saddam was deserving of his fate. Yet, I have some difficulty with binding a man and killing him. It touches something deep inside that sees no honor in such a death. Perhaps that was the point. Still, now that he has claimed his martyrdom, it is honor backfired. Dynasties rise and then they fall. Have we accomplished anything wonderful amidst all of the bloodshed and torture? I hope so. It is time for the Iraqis to play their own hand and time for us to stop stacking the deck. May 2007 bring peace.

On December 23rd, me and Dave made a Lager. It will now sit in the "Chumperator" for a couple of months until we bottle it. Most homebrewers don't make lagers, because you need temperatures between 38 and 50 degrees Fahrenheit during fermentation. After the initial, active fermentation, the brew will be moved into a glass carboy for a couple of months before bottling. The "Chumperator," is Dave's invention to keep the cool temperatures needed for a lager. It is a wooden box in his basement with a plastic pipe going outside to provide cool winter air. When the temperature outside gets too cold, Dave uses a sophisticated device to prevent the temperature from becoming too cold. He stuffs a rag into the pipe.

MERRY CHRISTMAS! If you happen to be offended by my wishing you a Merry Christmas , I would like to point out that my constitutional rights offer me the freedom of speech, freedom of the press and freedom of religion. It kind of makes you wonder what the controversy is about doesn't it? If someone wished me a happy Ramadan, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa , I would not be offended. Furthermore if I was, I would not expect that I had the right to make that person change. So, have a very Merry Christmas EVERYBODY! KJC

I was reading in the newspaper about some of the awful things that people do to each other around the world. One story was about a group of Hmong in Laos who had finally decided to surrender to the Communists, after hiding in the jungle for many years. They had been abandoned by the U.S. after the Vietnam War. Their fate was questionable when they were rounded up by soldiers and driven away in trucks. Most of them were reported to be women and children. Another story led off with a picture of a young Palestinian girl in tears. I found it heart-wrenching. It leaves me with the question, how can people hate so much that the tears of a child no longer affect them?

Bipartisan Commission on Iraq vs. President Bush December 12, 2006 UnAssociated Press On December 6, a bipartisan commission produced a report that said the situation in Iraq, is “grave and deteriorating,” and the United States’ ability “to influence events within Iraq is diminishing.” This came as the death toll for U.S. troops is nearing the 3,000 mark, troops from other countries, private contractors, journalists and thousands of Iraqis have died. Bush thanked the commission for its work and said that their input would be valuable as he reassessed the “sit-chee-ation.” Then the President announced that he would push for an additional 80-million-trillion-zillion troops to be deployed by the first of the year. After that, the President started laughing, and said that “the only way to peace, is through war.” He also said that “victory is the only option,” and it is his “solemn duty as President, to protect the citizens of the United States, by sending them to war.” The President did sa...

I have worked scoring exams for Special Education, and now as a detention supervisor at a Jr. High, I frequently have Special Education kids in detention. Among the problems I have noticed with the system, is that once a kid is labeled by a psychologist as a “behavior problem,” that child is suddenly allowed to stop trying, and stop behaving. The bad behavior is expected. Where does this leave the child when they grow up? Can they expect to say nasty, obscene and hurtful things to their boss and coworkers and then storm out to the parking lot for an hour to cool off? Aren’t kids supposed to learn coping skills in school to prepare for later life? Though I am not a licensed professional, I find it disturbing to expect less from a student and enable them to behave poorly because that student gets angry when asked to do schoolwork or behave in an acceptable manner.

The novel that I am currently writing is called, " Cottonwood ." It deals with the history in the bottomland forest of the Minnesota River Valley. As a volunteer park ranger in the Minnesota Valley National Wildlife Refuge, I have become interested in the history, animals and giant trees in the areas where I frequently hike. This story covers a lot of individual characters, events and natural history. It covers a considerable span of time -during the lifespan of a giant cottonwood tree. The story begins around the time when European immigrants began to move into the area. It deals with how the indigenous people and animals were displaced by the new arrivals. This story comes from history and from what I have observed on my many hikes into the river valley and the bottomland forest. I am perhaps a quarter of the way done with it. I am hoping for a new publisher. More information will come later about this. KJC

Yesterday a group of religious leaders decided to call for a boycott of US Airways, due to the removal of six suspicious Muslims on November 22. Now that radical religious people will no longer be flying on their airplanes, US Airways is now the safest airlines in the world. Therefore, if you want to have a safe flight and not be blown up or have your plane crash into buildings, etc., choose US Airways for your flight transportation needs. http://cutris.blogspot.com/2006/11/flying-while-muslim.html

Grandma passed away on Saturday. She was 96. When I was really young, I had three grandmas. That's because the mother of my grandma who just passed was still alive. She died at 99. Most of my grandparents died a long time ago. For most of my life I had one grandma. Now she is gone too.

“Flying While Muslim” was the title of today’s cover story in the St. Paul Pioneer Press. The initial title made me think it was going to implicate the airlines and ask us all to pity the poor Muslims who were behaving suspiciously. Fortunately, that isn’t how the article read, though these stories usually pull the liberals out of the woodwork. In my own opinion, I think the six Muslims Imams were intending to cause trouble. In post 9-1-1, how could they be so naïve as to think that loud praying and cursing America wouldn’t raise suspicions on a commercial airplane? I saw this type of tactic used when I worked for the county. Certain protected groups caused trouble, and when they were confronted by administration they levied accusations of prejudice/racism and filed a lawsuit. It effectively held administration at bay, because we live in a society that is hypersensitive to minority rights. In the case of the county, one of the biggest instigators was found to be dealing crack while wor...

Man Offended by Sun UnAssociated Press Land of the Easily Offended, USA November 21, 2006 A man was offended by the sun today, and said that he was humiliated by the fact that the sun was shining on him in a threatening way, without the man's permission. 14,563 lawyers are trying to persuade the man to choose them for his attorney, since this could become a major discrimination/harassment suit with long-term implications and possible multiple book deals. Several liberal groups turned out at a press conference this afternoon, to help shout, “Down with the sun!” When it was announced that the sun would set at 4:39PM, people cheered and then began to shoot guns into the air. Later, two people died from wounds they received from bullets falling from the sky. Some other people said that the sky had discriminated against the two because the sky is an infidel. The mob blamed this on the United States and began to chant “Death to America!” Then they began to burn American flags and throw ...