Norm L

Norm L
By Kevin J. Curtis


Finding n95 masks at the thrift store was a wonderful piece of luck thought Norm L. Johnson, as he walked across the street to his car. He was careful this time to move his mask out of the way before taking a sip of his green tea latte. He didn't want to repeat the disaster that happened yesterday afternoon, when he tried to drink through the mask and the entire concoction ended up in his lap. “Damn this pandemic!” He said aloud.

He examined the masks he’d just purchased for only 9 cents each. One of them had a bad stain on the front, but the other two looked like they had hardly been used! One never knew what kind of treasures you could find at the thrift store! A new n95 would cost more than a dollar.

Norm L. Johnson pulled his Fiat out onto the road and began driving home. Before he’d gotten far, he was blocked by a small stick in the road. A squirrel had dropped it there earlier. There was nothing to do, except turn the Fiat around and drive back toward downtown.

Though it was 9:46am, downtown Knockers Landing was nearly deserted. The pandemic had most people staying home. Norm was feeling a bit anxious now, and he wanted to get back to his bungalow on 1st and 2nd Streets. His wife Abigail would be roasting the turkey he hit with his car yesterday. It was amazing the Fiat hadn’t sustained more damage!

The turkey was still breathing after the accident, so Norm had taken it home and put it in bed with the twins to recuperate. A few minutes later, however, the big bird died; much to the delight of the twin baby boys.

Not wanting all that wild turkey meat to go to waste, Norm L. Johnson had gotten out the chainsaw and dressed the bird for dinner. Abigail was a wiz in the kitchen, so they would be eating good tonight!

Two and a half hours later, Norm had detoured around the stick—which by now had been carried off by a friendly Labrador. No matter, the Fiat didn’t use much gas anyway. As he rounded the corner, eager to show Abigail the n95 masks he’d gotten for such a bargain, he could smell the turkey cooking and saw the bonfire in the side yard.

This was going to be great! Now he was happy that he had splurged at the thrift store and bought that half bottle of wine too! Imagine, somebody had only drank half of it!

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