U.S. Looks to Space for Intelligence

U.S. Looks to Space for Intelligence
UnAssociated Press
August 16, 2020

The US Space Force is on a mission to find intelligent life in outer space! Presumably because it is so hard to find on Earth.

In other news, a transporter malfunction aboard the Starship Enterprise, caused Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump to become blended into a single, perfect political candidate! Unfortunately the two sides were unable to agree when to breathe, and nearly suffocated before Chief Engineer, Montgomery Scott was able to reverse the process and recreate two, separate, illogical and ineffectual leaders.